I never liked coffee.
Then I moved to Brazil.
Down there they drink coffee with chocolate. It’s a mocha, but way better. I loved it but never could create a replica back here in the States. I’m not sure if it’s the coffee that’s lacking, or the chocolate, or both.
When my husband and I were dating, we would stop at a local diner every Saturday morning for coffee. It tasted a little bit like watered down dirt. Not kidding. But we went every week anyway.
It wasn’t until we were married and went to Haiti that we fell into the habit of good coffee drinking. Haitian coffee is creamy and strong and a bit like drinking dessert for breakfast.
We didn’t have a coffee maker so my husband would get up early, light a match to start the stove, heat up water and then slowly, carefully, poor hot water over a paper towel (I don’t know who brought them to the mission house but we were eternally grateful) filled with ground coffee.
He would serve me a cup of creamy goodness and then would head back to bed. I would curl up on the porch with my coffee and Bible and think, by golly, I’ve got the best husband in the world.
Coffee is still our love language.
And to be honest, it’s not really about the coffee. In fact, sometimes we substitute tea or hot chocolate.
It’s mostly about having something little and simple that says, quietly, “I thought of you and I love you.”
And my husband is so, so good at this. It is one of the biggest things I love about him.
In fact, just yesterday, he showed up at the door with a cup of Stewart’s coffee (the closest thing we’ve found to Haitian coffee in the United States) and handed it over with a kiss and a rush back out the door to work.
Think of something little that your husband does several times a week that shows you his love. It might not be coffee… maybe it’s picking up his socks (in which case, I’ll be a little jealous) or maybe he washes dishes, or takes the kids for a few hours so you can breathe, or brings home little prizes for you…
I’m sure you can think of something. And once you do: go tell him “thank you”!