I sat across from a line of women in the visitors room at the local jail that Tuesday night. They were all wearing orange jumpsuits and their stories came in fragmented pieces during the sharing time. We prayed together. We sang worship songs. We shared a few little stories. We read about Moses. You know about Moses, right? The man who messed up big time? Miraculously saved when the … [Read more...] about One thing that brings comfort when life is just plain hard
The Lord told me I would be a mother. He spoke right into my barrenness and said that He had given me a mother’s heart for a reason. He had not forgotten me and He would not forget me. It was a pretty bold statement to say to a woman facing infertility. A woman who was crawling through the barren wasteland of loss and miscarriage and broken dreams. And if He would have just said it … [Read more...] about How to Be a Mom (Even if You Don’t Have Kids)
Some stories don’t turn out like we expect them to. I’m sure Mary would agree with me. She said yes to God’s plan, despite her limited understanding. She put her hand right in His and followed the path laid down for her. But I somehow doubt she ever expected where all it would lead her. When my husband and I were first contacted about adopting a little unborn baby, we went right to our … [Read more...] about When Life Turns Out Different Than What You Expected
Once upon a time I thought infertility was destroying my faith. I didn't realize that true faith is indestructible. The part of me that was crumbling? It wasn't, nor had it ever been, faith. James knew this truth, which is why he instructed the church in James 1 to, "Count it all joy when you face trials of various kinds..." Translation: Count it joy, Natasha, when you face … [Read more...] about Infertility is a Joy?
I didn't really think of the ramifications of having a daughter who can read well. The other day I came into the room and she was snuggled up on the couch with Pain Redeemed in her hands. I raised my eyebrows but didn't say anything. Later she came to me and hugged me from behind. "Oh, Mommy," she said into my back, "I didn't know you lost a baby." She was snuffling and wiping tears before I … [Read more...] about Though I May Never Bear a Child…
I was sitting on the sofa, tears streaming down my face. My words came out stuttered and halting. "I just feel like now it's final. I'll never have a child." It sounded harsh, even to my own ears. My husband's hand tightened around mine. And then the man seated across the room from me sighed heavy. "Actually, Tasha," he said, "I've been sensing something from the Lord for awhile about this, but … [Read more...] about Faith in Life and Death (and infertility)